Jack Black at my Grocery Store!

Well, he had that Jack Black physique (not that I'm knocking Jack's bod - notice I haven't provided a picture of myself here). The kids and I were sitting in the car, motor running, waiting for my wife to grab two items. And out of Shop'N'Save's front door came Jack Black, escorted by a security guard! The security guard (SG from here on) was pushing him from behind, when Jack spun around and began to shove back. SG grabbed him by the wrist and said something; Jack felt the need to strike him. (I'm sure it was called for, but I still thought it was pretty awesome that I already had the car running.) So SG went for pepper spray - yowza! Jack wasn't deterred; he swung again. SG had him by the t-shirt at this point, but Jack wriggled out of it pretty quickly. (Are you getting this kids? This isn't that play wrestling like in Nacho Libre.) SG pepper sprayed him a second time! Jack broke free and, I kid you not, sprinted like Carl Lewis toward an eight foot fence and EFFORTLESSLY cleared it. (If this is any preview of the 2008 Olympics, the U.S. is going to kick ass.) Twenty seconds after this all occured my wife exited the front of the store, oblivious to what had just happened.

The moral of the story? Don't waste time in the grocery store - you never know what you're missing in the parking lot.